What Do You Really Want?

It is common to find people standing in front of the toothpaste section of a retail store trying to decide what brand of toothpaste to pick. They spend minutes reading the details on the packs of various toothpaste brands. Even those who have used a brand for a while, sometimes, get confused by what seems to be a better one. This is the 21st century dilemma; we are spoiled for choice.

Now, deciding what we want seems tough – many options to pick from. Hence, it’s common to get confused. It’s one reason why we tend to think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. There is an instability in our attitude when we’re faced with many options that all look good. Often, we make choices wondering if the alternative could be better.

Options are great. But if options leave you immobilised, then there is a problem because knowing what you want is essential to success. You must know how to be single-minded in the pursuit of your goal.

Babies are interesting. Unlike many adults, babies and toddlers know exactly what they want. The toddler zeros in on an item and keeps her attention until she gets it, fails to get it or losses interest. But once interest is established, nothing else matters to the baby. As a baby, you were clear about what you wanted and moved towards it without fear. So, what happened?

We become adults. In addition to the options challenge, we face social pressures. You are told what you should do, have or be. You get married to please family. You become a doctor to please your dad. You spend to please your friends. You buy the new car to please your spouse. You maintain a certain image to please society. And guess what? You succeed in pleasing everyone but yourself.

This can change. And one way is to start honouring your preferences, no matter how small. When it’s time to make a choice, ask yourself: what do I prefer? What do I enjoy? The truth is: you have a preference in every situation, whether you recognise it or not. Begin to acknowledge and celebrate what you prefer. It’s important for a healthy existence.

Please stop settling for less than you want. Your preferences matter. Do not allow anyone tell you otherwise. What you want isn’t insignificant. Your preferences express your identity. What you prefer is how society learns to honor your presence, essence and identity.